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Toastmasters: Lessons good and bad

What important things have you learned about Public Speaking, Leadership, and Networking this last year? Were there any pieces of advice that turned out to be misleading? Here are my top three lessons learned, and the three things that I feel need to have their myths busted:

1. Thanking the Audience:
Myth: “Don’t thank your audience because they should be thanking you.”

If you find that you are saying this out loud, please stop! The two are unrelated. You can thank one another. The audience does this by clapping, buying your products, or asking you to come back. You can (and should) thank them by saying “Thank You for having me here today”, and then giving them a conclusion that they can remember.

Not long ago I was standing in front of a room presenting my Planned Spontaneity program. Things were going well, including some good audience interaction. I used my normal “before I conclude I’ll take a few questions” line, since, like most of my topics, this one lends itself nicely to having a Q&A session. That went well, and I timed taking the last question so I would have at least five minutes to give a conclusion. Then, I said, “I want to thank you for inviting me out today, and for the wonderful lunch…” but before I could transition into my conclusion, the organizer stood up to bring me my gift (a really nice coffee mug w/chocolates inside) and the applause began. And no…I wasn’t over time.

I’m not sure about the lesson learned here. I think next time I’ll try “Before I close…” to transition from the Q&A into my “thank you” to see if the next group lets me give my conclusion.

2. Apologize:
Myth: Never apologize.

If you make the kind of mistake that requires an apology, then give one. If, say, you kick someone as you walk past them “working the room”, then say you are sorry. If you toss an audience member a free piece of candy (or whatever) and miss, say you are sorry. You get the idea.

Avoid apologizing when there is nothing that can be done about it, or if it’s just something to make you fell better about you own errors. For instance, never apologize for being “unprepared”. The audience won’t know unless you just plain suck. If that happens, apologize for sucking, not for being lazy about your preparation.  

If you have a situation where they have to wait while you fiddle with papers or something, instead of apologizing, consider giving them a short “talk amongst yourselves” exercise while you get your collective stuff together.

Once, at a Toasmasters contest I needed a minute to finish the winners certificates when I was given the results. I followed a more experienced Toastmaster’s advice and asked eveyone on the room to find someone nearby and introduce themselves, exchange club information and mention one thing they are getting out of being in Toastmasters. I had time to get my papers right and lined up, and then just needed to reign them back in. Plus: some folks met people they might not have spoken to otherwise.

3. Reusing material:
Myth: Every speech should be new. 

On the show Jeopardy, this would probably be the answer to “What method of speaking can you use to ensure one-dimensional growth?” I’m not suggesting that you never try new things. Of course you should try new things, new topics, and new approaches.

Also, I’m not suggesting that you just recite the same drivel over and over to “get credit”. Instead, from time to time you should look at material you’ve used before and see if you can improve it and deliver it more successfully.

There are a plethora of speaking lessons out there that are being taught and retaught every day. Most of them are rock solid (especially many of the lessons in Toastmasters), but not every one is on-target. Don’t be affraid to seek a second, or third, opinion and do some of your own research. By speaking and learning from those that have “been there and done that” you’ll pick up some good tips and avoid some of the bad myths.

Book Review: Buy-ology

Matrin Lindstrom has put together an intriguing study of how we think with regard to our purchase decisions. Using some state-of-the-art medical technology, Buy-ology: Truth and Lies About What We Buy sheds light on how advertising affects our decision making process.

What’s great about this book:
Many interesting examples of why we make the types of purchasing decisions we make, including how marketing (and specifically advertising) affects us.

Limiting Factors:
I have to admit, it turned out this wasn’t as interesting of a topic as I expected up front. The beginning included more description of the process than was needed.

Recommendations:
This is probably a must-read for those considering different forms of advertising. For others, it might be an interesting read, but not necessarily the best use of your book-reading time.

Rob’s Rating system (bolded, the rating is)
Buy now at full price
Buy if you get a discount
Wait for the paperback (of course, it’s only in paperback)
Wait for someone else to be done with the paperback
If you’ve read my review, you got the jist of it

Speaking Tips: Surprise isn't your best tactic

Ever see a speaker try to build up to a surprise revelation, only to let down the audience with either something that was really obvious, or worse – something that was artificially forced to be the opposite of obvious?

Are there times when surprise can work for a speaker? Certainly.

Times not to surprise?

1. The introduction. Unless you landed a last-minute-famous-name-surprise-keynote for your group, there is rarely a good reason to withhold their name until the end of the introduction. Better: include the name early in the introduction, without a pause, and then say their name a second time at the end to welcome them to the front. Make sure to tell them your plan so they don’t charge up too early.

2. Your main points. Of course you can use teasers, but some speakers will try to force the element of surprise too long. I once saw a speaker that wanted to tell us about a group of words he had been taught that we could all benefit from. All of them were to be four letter words, and he teased us by including that a couple would start with H, a couple with D, one with S and one with F. By the third word it was clear even to the sleepers that there was no profanity coming, but he kept trying to act like the next one “might shock you”.

3. When the audience doesn’t want to be there. You’ve been in that audience, right? Compelled by the boss (or the boss’ boss) to be at a training event, the last things you want are to hear how impressive the speaker is or some loooong lead in to why you’re there. If you are that speaker, don’t try to hold that audience with a surprise ending. Make a connection with them, let them know your point, and make sure they know you value their time.

Just like with any suggestions, there are exceptions that you will discover in your own practice. However, if your default plan is to work with your audience instead of trying to impress them, you’ll see a stronger connection and you’ll have a stronger impact than with tricks and surprises.

Book Review: Million Dollar Consulting Toolkit

Alan Weiss, PhD has a long list of successful books. The book Million Dollar Consulting is considered “THE definitive work to grow a solo consulting practice.” Just by itself, you can learn a great deal about the process of starting your own business. However, to take your learning and preperation a step further, there is the Million Dollar Consulting Toolkit.

In this work, you’ll find checklists, guidelines, forms, templates, examples, suggested reading material (referencing greats like Peter Drucker), and additional helpful resources. Also, there are links to downloadable forms and templates from the publisher’s web site. Of course, Alan’s website has some great information as well.

What’s great about this book:
You can read it cover to cover, or if you have some focused concerns you can work through the areas of greatest interest first. Alan covers all of the essentials, such as:
Managing your office or home practice – including checklists for equipment, insurance, and other professional needs (Tax, Attorney, Web Designer, etc.)
Marketing and Selling your services – including techniques and examples on how to make cold calling less “cold”
Traveling for Business
Managing your own web site
Balancing life and work
Finding new leads and repeat business
Forms – invoices, expense reimbursments, etc.
Article Writing – including a “letter to the editor” template
Advanced Marketing techniques – like interviews, book publishing and professional speaking
And – as it say on the back of the book – Much More!

Limiting Factors:
While you can easily use this without reading Million Dollar Consulting, it really does work better as a companion product.

Great Quotes:
Speaking and Consulting should be a synergy

Recommendations:
This is both a useful read and a critical reference if you are looking to consult or speak for a living.  Since I purchased it last year I’ve referenced it countless times as I have begun the process of my own business.

Rob’s Rating system (bolded, the rating is)
Buy now at full price
Buy if you get a discount
Wait for the paperback
Wait for someone else to be done with the paperback
If you’ve read my review, you got the jist of it

Toastmasters: An advanced twist

Are you having trouble seeing a benefit to continued membership in Toastmasters after completing one of your educational goals, such as a Competent Communicator (CC) or Distinguished Toastmaster (DTM)? If you fall into one of those groups, then you are an advanced member. If you feel ready to take on some new challenges then read on!

Speaking about advanced Toastmasters, these suggestions all assume you have at least a CC or equivalent award:

Idea #1. You may not know this, but there is no Toastmasters International (TI) rule on content. That means you can take a speech you have given before, polish it up and give it again as another CC topic. Some members think (erroneously) that this is some sort of foul, but how can it be a foul to improve your speaking with a manual speech? I have yet to hear a really good answer to why you shouldn’t do this. Note: I’m not suggesting giving the same speech the same way 10 weeks straight and taking credit. I’m talking about earning credit by taking feedback and improving a presentation to make it better.

At a recent TM meeting where I spoke about this, there was some discussion during the Q & A about reusing speech titles and TI’s reaction to “giving the same speech twice” when the award is submitted. To that, I’d say if you use the feedback to change the speech, it is no longer the same speech, and just add “Rev A” to the title in the back of your manual (but not during the introduction).

I did receive a reply from TI on their opinion (emphasis is mine):

We highly suggest that a member do a new speech for each manual speech so that they can truly learn and grow as a public speaker. There isn’t any official rule against a member giving the same speech for each project in the CC manual while following and fulfilling the objectives for each project.

Every manual project teaches a new speaking skill, and each project in a manual builds upon the skills learned in previous projects. If a member truly wants to improve their speaking skills, every speech that member gives should be prepared according to a project’s instructions and objectives.   

I only disagree with the “truly learn and grow” implication. I think they are worried about a member simply reciting a speech over and over to claim credit. That is a valid concern. But, in my suggestion I believe that taking feedback from a speech and improving it for the next time is easily as valuable as creating one from scratch. Be your own judge.

Idea #2. Don’t try to work on the specific project objective in a CC speech. This one flies in the face of the TI HQ note above, but we’re talking about advanced techniques for advanced speakers. Since you’ve finished your CC already, you should be integrating all of those CC skills into every speech (within reason). Now, you can use projects 2-8 especially to get feedback on how well you do when you’re giving a presentation that isn’t “designed” for a specific project.

I tried this myself recently with a marketing report I gave to my District Executive Committee (DEC) by using Project 7 (research your topic). I received some very useful feedback that will make my next report much better. If I hadn’t, I’d probably repeat some of the mistakes I made the next time (ever seen that happen?)

You can also do that for contest speeches. Don’t try to do extravocal variety (or whatever the project calls for) in a contest speech. Just give the speech as you would (you know…to win) and get the written feedback. You’ll get more useful (and focused) information than just asking an audience member “What did you think?” after the whole contest is over.

Idea #3. Conversely, do try to work on the objective. We could all be better at vocal variety or gestures. Give it a second (or fifth) go through the CC manual to stay sharp.

Idea #4. There is also no rule on preparation time. Use that next CC manual to practice impromptu speeches. Consider a question you could have to answer in real life and limit yourself to 5-7 minutes. Or, if you are in a district leadership position, practice those types of presentations you may need to give on a club visit. You are giving manual speeches (or modules) on your visits, right???

Competing an award in Toastmasters isn’t the end of a trip, it’s a milestone on your journey. Use some of these tips to keep your skills fresh, and keep setting a great example for your club. Post a comment to let me know how it works, or if you have some other ideas.

Book Review: Rework

 Rework was written by the guys that brought you the 37signals website. Jason Fried and David Heinemeier Hansson have created quite a buzz with their web site and “no business model” style of success.

What’s great about this book:
It’s a quick 280 page read. Lots of breaks in the text in a way you can stop and come back. In fact, it’s written a lot like a series of blog posts; easy to digest.

I like the examples given for how to limit your focus, instead of trying to be all things to all customers. Some of the more interesting topics:
You need less than you think
No time is no excuse
Making the call is making progress
Out-teach your competition

Limiting Factors:
The tone right off of the bat is “we’ve got it right.” There is some stimulating talk about why some conventional wisdom isn’t really as solid as we’re led to believe.

The downside is you might take that advice to the other extreme. Maybe that’s okay, but then again not all meetings are pure evil…

Great Quotes:
Good enough is fine
The real world isn’t a place, it’s an excuse
Build half a product, not a half-assed product

Recommendations:
Another great read. If you’re a fan of books that give you a new way to think, then you’ll enjoy this one.

Rob’s Rating system (bolded, the rating is)
Buy now at full price
Buy if you get a discount
Wait for the paperback
Wait for someone else to be done with the paperback
If you’ve read my review, you got the jist of it

Weekly Column: Your Second Habit

“Nothing will work unless you do.” Maya Angelou (1928 – ) US author & poet

The fact is this: there are no shortcuts to success. No matter how you define success, whether it’s all about the money, happiness, position, or even health. You can’t get anywhere worthwhile in life unless you do the work.

What you may not expect is, the work doesn’t always have to be hard labor. It’s okay to enjoy your efforts. Case in point: I actually like writing. Sure there are times when I get writers block or just don’t feel up to typing anything today. But the truth is, you can find satisfaction in a job well done.

First, identify the main goal and visualize your success. Creating a post on this blog is a goal of mine that takes work. I need to decide on a fresh topic in an area I believe will be of interest to my audience, and see it published in my mind. Your goal may be to start a business, find customers, or create a presentation. Once you have that goal and can see it’s result mentally, you need to move to the next step.

Second, act on that next step to move you toward your vision. For me, open WordPress and start typing. You might want to start with a Google search about your topic, or draft out an idea for how your business will work. Don’t try to make all of the steps at once, just pick that next step and go do it. Once you are done, then look at where you are and prepare that next step. Note: Some steps will be harder than others. The trick is not to let that difficult step #9 (you foresee) stop you from doing step #1 right now.

Third, ignore the shortcuts. In so many cases, including yours, those shortcuts will result in a lower-quality product, or complete failure. I’m not suggesting to ignore new technologies or superior tools. I’m saying that get rich quick ideas aren’t quick (unless you count failing fast), won’t make you rich (even if you see short term gains) and really aren’t even ideas (they are schemes).

The opening quote was simple, yet clear. If you don’t do the work, your idea, plan, or strategy won’t work either. The first habit was to find out what your customers want, then give it to them. When it’s time to provide the product or service they want, you are going to have to do the work to make sure they are satisfied.  – Make that your next habit to success.

Book Review: Switch

Switch – How to change things when change is hard is the new book by Chip Heath and Dan Heath, who were the authors of the bestselling book Made to Stick. In this work, the authors address the reasons why change can be difficult for humans like us, and how you can use this knowledge to see successful change in your own world.

The premise that our minds are driven by two main components, one emotional and one rational is, or course, not news. But what was facinating on many levels is how the Heath brothers liken the emotional mind to an elephant and the rational mind to the rider. The elephant’s sheer force results in it directing most of our behavior, while the rider is on top planning, thinking, and trying to steer.

There are some really interesting examples, such as when dealing with nutrition – working to make change isn’t about vague goals (i.e. “eat healthy”), but about specific actions you can take, such as “buy 1% milk”.

Also, many of the successes describbed in the book let you know that you don’t need resources or structural authority to affect change.

What’s great about this book:
SECTION ONE: DIRECT THE RIDER
Find the Bright Spots
Script the Critical Moves
Point to the Destination

SECTION TWO: MOTIVATE THE ELEPHANT
Find the Feeling
Shrink the Change 
Grow Your People

SECTION THREE: SHAPE THE PATH 
Tweak the Environment 
Build Habits 
Rally the Herd

Also, each topic has a “clinic” in it to walk you through an real-world type of example to reinforce the points, and help you compare your analysis with that of the authors.

Limiting Factors:
This may require a major mindset change. Personally, I’ve always been a “find the bight spot” person, but I never really had it put into context before. If you are a “solve all the big issues” type, this will be a big shift for you.

Great Quotes:
If Spock wants to get up at 5:45 a.m., he’ll just get up. No drama required.
Knowledge does not change behavior – Jerry Sternin
Break down the change until it no longer spooks the Elephant

An Acronym you may not have heard:
TBU – True but useless

Recommendations:
If you are someone who wants to see things change for the better, in your organization, in your home or anywhere in your life, then this book is a must-read.

Rob’s Rating system (bolded, the rating is)
Buy now at full price (and it’s only $13 on Amazon, as of today)
Buy if you get a discount
Wait for the paperback
Wait for someone else to be done with the paperback
If you’ve read my review, you got the jist of it

Weekly Column: First Habit of Success

“In the Land of the blind, the one-eyed man is King.” Desiderius Erasmus, Adagia (III, IV, 96). Dutch author, philosopher, & scholar (1466 – 1536).

This week, let’s discuss what is arguably the first habit of successful entrepreneurs:  Understanding what your customers want, and how to provide that to them.

The reason this is such an important habit is the same reason many businesses struggle. If you try to fit your customers into the mold of what you want to provide, you will find your customers going elsewhere. Successful businesses and successful leaders know that they have to constantly adapt, stay on top of customer feedback, and even reinvent themselves and their products to stay ahead in the marketplace.

It’s easy to find examples of this in big business (Apple, Google, even McDonald’s), but what about the small business and consultant world? How do you, as a small or independent business owner adapt and stay ahead of the power curve?

First, learn to filter out the noise. Some customers want your product or service now, customized, and for free. Anything less and they complain. This is hard, but you may just have to let them. Best case: part ways amicably. Refund their money if you have to, but don’t let them drag you down with crazy personalized service that cost you sales with real customers. Note: not every complaint is a bad customer, but you have to identify the difference.

Second, listen to the real customers. They are the ones that bought your product and use it, and can include ones that are enjoying your free content too. Chances are they are the ones that would give you a testimonial. They have ideas for things that would make their lives better, and may suggest products or services that you can provide. Example: A customer says they need help giving PowerPoint presentations at work. Response: Provide a free 10-step tip sheet on your web site, and then offer a one-hour audio (or video) lesson on PowerPoint success and an on-site “lunch and learn” presentation at your normal rates.

Third, pay attention (but not too much) to your competition. You don’t always have to do something “new and different” than your competition. Sometimes just putting your spin on something makes it worth while for a segment of your audience. For instance, as an experienced IT Project Manager, I can position myself to provide the same type of presentation training as others in my market, but with my point of view as someone who has seen success from the IT arena. If another speaker creates a program on how to inject humor into your presentations, I can look at creating a program on using humor in the IT environment.

This may sound almost easy when you read about it, but in real life it’s not so easy. You need the right Attitude toward serving your customer base, the Commitment to stay the course and adjust your heading from time-to-time and the desire to achieve Excellence in your efforts.

The opening quote eluded to your ability to lead those who are not yet fortunate enough to see what you see, and need your expertise to move forward in their own lives. Take a look at what you are providing, what your customers are telling you, and bridge that gap to stay successful. Seth Godin says “Real Artists Ship”. Not every effort will be successful, but some will. No missed opportunity will help you achieve success. Find out what your customers want, then give it to them – Make that your first habit to success.